Right now I'm suffering an allergy attack. It's not like this is an unusual occurrence; no, it happens every year. I sniffle and sneeze. I cough and spend my days in a haze of fatigue and heavy ennui. All because that whore of a a fucking entity, nature, has decided to spray her seed all over the place like a fucking hormonal teenaged boy with a serious case of compulsory masturbation.
I hate it! I want her out of my life. I want her to go the hell away. I want astroturf instead of grass. I want holograms instead of trees. I want a world that looks like nature without any of the trappings.
Sure, yeah, the world might be a bit sterile. Okay, it might not be that inspiring, but it will be comfortable. I mean, shit, we want to control everything else. You want your kid to have blue eyes? Bam! You got enough money you got it. You want people to think a certain way? Slap, just put a good enough marketing campaign together. Done. Addressed. You want an allergy-free spring? Limp-dick...Sorry you're on your own.
Why can't we effectively take care of this nature situation? I mean that bitch is unstable. From the pollen to the random snow falls in March she just doesn't seem all that consistent. And we put up with her. It's just not freaking right.
I want her gone. I want her replaced. I want her methadone-taking sister to take over for awhile. You know that one who just sits on the couch and watches her stories. That would be better. This would go smoothly. Nothing drastic would happen, and the world would be far more comfortable. It's be like going from a chastity belt to silk lingerie. Or from nut-huggers to silk boxers. It'd be better; and people like me wouldn't have to spend half the spring sniffling like a cocaine head aching for his next sniff.
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